Every new year I imagine myself as one of those people who come up with brilliant goals and resolutions and every year I pretty much come up with not-a-whole-lot.
In 2010 I lost exactly 1 kilogram of weight, which was not really my intention, no, in fact, I really thought I would have hit my goal weight this year. When I started (the last time) in March 2009 I weighed in at 98.5KG or 217 lbs (the year before I know I’d reached 101 at some point, so there was some effort in 2008, just not a lot). My last weigh-in of 2009 was on December 30th at 82.2KG which is a loss for 2009 of 16.3 KGS or 36lbs. My last weigh-in of 2010 was on December 29th, at 81.2KG or 17.3 KGS / 38 lbs lost..
On top of all of the events in December (work stress, my dad being diagnosed with prostate cancer and my beloved cat of 18 years dying), weighing in 1 kilo less than last year really pissed me off and brought me to a point beyond frustration. Since complaining about it on twitter is reduced to 140 characters per tweet I had the feeling that many people just thought I was bitching and nay-saying to suggestions and being stubborn about Weight Watchers in particular without being willing to try anything else. I want to clear a few things up right now:
1) I have tried several different variations of eating; eating more, eating less, eating carbs on work out days, eating every few hours, eating only every 4 -6 hours, eating more fruit, eating less fruit, eating all my points and activity points, even eating more bread (on dietitian’s suggestion). Really. I swear I have tried.
2) I follow Weight Watchers probably just for the guidelines alone. I follow no set meal plan, I eat what I want/like when I want. WW is designed to let you choose and fit it in the program whilst following the fit formulas. Counting calories (while it works for others and that’s a personal choice) is definitely not for me. Why? Because for me, eating is more than just a number of calories. If I knew I should only eat 1500 cals per day I’d just eat that much in chocolate or peanut butter. If I started counting calories I’d have to also count fat, protein, fiber and that’s already where my head starts spinning. Why would I do that when WW has already worked it out for me?
3) I am definitely eating enough.
4) I eat probably 5 servings of fruit and 5 servings of vegetables per day. The fruit could be an issue but I’ve already reduced it from last summer and I need something to eat in between meals.
5) I do think my activity level at times is too high for a standard member of Weight Watchers, but then again, if others are losing weight every week and reaching their goals, why aren’t I? (I know, everyone is different).
6) I have shaken things up more times than I can shake a stick at.
Why am I telling you all of this? Because I’m done. I’m done talking about my weight. I’m done comparing and feeling sad and like a failure. I’m NOT a failure!! This year will be more running and less whinging about my weight. I started running to get fit and I have continued because it actually makes me feel great, so the focus is being shifted to that.
I am still overweight. I don’t want to be, but OK, it is what it is right now. How many times have I said to people “It doesn’t matter how long it takes you to get there, it only matters that you get there”? I need to follow my own words of wisdom, don’t you think?
December did not turn out the way I wanted it to turn out. It’s ok. I have a new month and a new start and I am excited about the future. I wanted to sign up for six races in 2011 and those races are:
1) Egmond half marathon (10.5K portion) – 9 JANUARY
2) Zandvoort Circuit Run (this was my first race last year) 12 K – 27 MARCH
3) Utrecht Marathon – HALF MARATHON 25 APRIL
4) Rondje vom Ederveen 15K – 11 JUNE
5) Bridge to Bridge Arnhem 10K – 12 SEPTEMBER
6) Zevenheuvelenloop Nijmegen 15K – 21 NOVEMBER
I reserve the right to add races to this list :) I would like to do at least one race outside of the Netherlands, I just have to figure out where and when.
So. There are no resolutions. There are no “goals for the year”. Sure there’s stuff I’d like to accomplish. Fitness related and totally non-fitness related. What it boils down to is feeling good about myself, not only my physical body, but my mind, my soul. Running helps, so I’m going to go with that.
What are you going to do more of this year? What less?
Happy New Year Everyone! I wish you all maximum peace, happiness, laughter, love and of course your favorite pie on special occasions.